4th Chemo Tomorrow

I have my 4th chemo appointment tomorrow morning at 9am. I am so sad....I feel so great today and it just sucks to think that I am going to be knocked down again for another 5-7 days. Moan!

We had a small birthday party for Kyle today. His birthday is not for another week, but I knew that I wouldn't feel up for pulling together a party during one of my "bad" weeks so we bumped the party up to today. The funny thing is that it didn't matter either way -- the little guy had no clue that all the festivities were in his honor. He was just happy to be surrounded by his friends and to eat pizza (organic and mostly vegetarian, of course!) and cake. He was so cute blowing out the candles -- he didn't really understand the fact that he actually needed to lean toward the cake when blowing, and so he sat back about two feet and made his funny little scrunched-up-face, 2-year-old blows from there. He didn't have a prayer -- the flames barely flickered! Luckily, one of Luke's friends helped him out in order to keep the festivities rolling along.

During the party, my neighbor and my friends, Jan and Cindi, were all commenting on how great I look despite everything that I have gone through. In fact, Jan was joking that I really need to avoid going down to the school to drop Luke off once school is back in session because all the other moms who have been kind enough to bring meals and/or help in other ways are going to think that it's all a big joke and that I am secretly just fine. Ha!! Ohhhh, I only wish! I told them that the only reason that everyone thinks I still look great is that no one ever see me on my bad days. I basically go into hiding for about 7 days and then resurface once I feel like my old self again. And since I haven't lost my hair, I still look pretty normal. Although, that might be changing soon -- my hair is starting to fall out like crazy!! The doctor told me that it would "thin out" a bit, but I feel like I am losing at least 500 hairs a day -- yikes!! And I still have 10 weeks to go.

Anyway, please keep me in your prayers tomorrow. I am hoping that this round of chemo is easier than the last three (or at least the same as the last time, since that was my easiest so far.) It's still crazy for me to think of the fact that I am pouring poison into my body every other week....Just thinking about it makes me realize just how powerful and evil cancer really is. I hope that I live to see the day when a cancer treatment is developed that is as easy as popping an aspirin. That will truly be a day for celebration!